I Nearly Fell For It
Some days it's super hard to be ok with my weight. I look in the mirror and don't always recognize who I am. I thought I had made more progress though but the other day I guess I was especially vulnerable and came across an ad for this Garcinia. I haven't gone the route of buying random weight loss products off of the internet before, but before I even knew it, I had fall for the "free trial" period. For several days I had that old hopeful feeling as I thought about my weight. You know the one - it niggles in the back of your brain telling you that you finally have something that will make the difference. And you begin to pin all of your hopes on it. I hate that feeling, I truly do but not bad enough I guess. And then about 3-4 days after I ordered it (it actually took 6 days for it to arrive), I was listening to a new podcast I just subscribed to. It's called "Nutrition Matters" with Paige Smathers. She reminded me how weight loss products and diets will only sabotage my emotional health, and undermine all of the work I have done. I look back over the past 8 months and the strides I have made; the work I have done to my head...to my heart and I decided that I just can't get back on that roller-coaster. And I definitely was a little sad as I made that decision because you give up a little bit of a dream when you decide that you aren't going to do a single active thing about your weight. So this morning when I looked in the mirror before I got in the shower, I stood for a moment looking at my body. I said to myself, "I appreciate the fact that this body is going through this with me. I am grateful that this body is strong despite all that I have done to it. I respect this body and that it has helped me achieve so much in my life. I love this body despite it's faults. I am working on me." My Garcinia came yesterday (Saturday) and I will make the phone call tomorrow to return it. I am healing myself 100%, not just partially and I am re-committing myself to not go down that road ever again.
